Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Romance and roses

I have to confess... our relationship has been completely rosy since we met. Until now.

Tomorrow I have plans to meet another girl for a drink... another femme actually. A femme I met online. I've never met her in the flesh and that's fine. I have no interest in her, and I'm not particularly interested in dating anyone else, nor being with a femme. But it marked the first time my Bride-to-be has been jealous of me with another woman.

It raised all sorts of feelings - the feeling of being flattered. Bride-to-be has been jealous of me with men, but I'm gay. I always found that kind of confusing, so when Bride-to-be became concerned about me with another woman, I was kind of impressed. I also felt flattered - she is fearful of losing me. No matter how you see it, it's kind of flattering. But on the negative side of things, I was concerned... concerned that she was getting possessive. I've had a possessive partner in the past, and I struggle with that.

We're getting married... she needs to trust me. And ultimately she does. What I've been impressed with is how open our communication is, how much we've talked. There have been tears, I won't deny that, but ultimately I'm happy with how we've talked about it.

Can there be a winner in this situation? I don't know. I don't actually think so. If I don't go, I'll feel controlled. If I do go, she'll feel jealous. Hmmmmm...

1 comment:

  1. Congratulations!

    Your blog has been nominated for a Lezzy Award in the Lesbian Parenting/Wedding blog. For more information on the awards please visit http://thlesbianlifestyle.com